Parenting is a learn as you go sort of endeavour. In no particular order, here are some things I have discovered about life with my little person:
10. Trying to walk anywhere with a toddler will feel like a slow form of torture. I don't drive here, so every errand and grocery run requires walking- even if just to a train station or bus stop. One bonus of life in a city is that there are lots of shops close to our flat, making it simple and quick to run to a store for a litre of milk or whatever I forgot in our bigger shopping trip. At least it used to be... Seriously, that quick errand is NEVER quick with a toddler in tow. How many times can you say 'Let's go' or 'Come on'? How many piles of poop can you successfully maneuver your kid away from? How many trips, fall and scraped knees can occur in a less than two block walk? How many individual leaves or cracks in the sidewalk can you stop and examine before you decide that carton of milk just isn't worth it?
9. Toddler's cry and/or whine A LOT. And most of the time you won't understand why. Even when you do know the reason there is often nothing you can do about it. My son frequently sobs about his food 'breaking'. He desperately wants me to put his 'broken' crackers back together and simply won't accept that it is okay to just eat the two halves separately. Before I became a parent, I never envisioned myself losing it over a Peppa Pig yogurt, which apparently does not display the 'right' character. I find myself attempting to explain to a disbelieving 2 year old that the contents are exactly the same, then ordering him to either 'eat the Zoe Zebra yogurt or eat nothing,' while vowing to just buy the plain yogurts next time to prevent this scenario in future. (But then Daddy does the next grocery run and, completely oblivious to my aforementioned vow, brings home Thomas the Tank yogurts...)
8. Toddlers are just small people. It can be easy to treat them like babies, or pets and railroad past their opinions (which are often strange, but not invalid), but learning to respect your child as a person matters. I don't mean that you have to give them whatever they want, but I do think we need to listen better and pay more attention to what matters to our little ones. There have been times I thought my son was being difficult or misbehaving, when actually he was trying to tell me that he was afraid. Equally, knowing what your kid likes or cares about can help you to chose your battles. My kid often flipped out if I tried to dress him in a t-shirt that did not display a large vehicle of some kind. So when we shop, we make a point of buying shirts with dump trucks, trains and cranes- he needs the shirts so why not buy him ones that we know he wants to wear? Problem solved.
7. Family mealtimes are never the picture perfect way you imagined them before you had kids. They are often chaotic, messy, filled with disciplining and totally totally worth it. I dread the conflict over what is for dinner and how a certain some one 'doesn't like' a food that they have eaten happily every other time you made it, but I also love having all the faces I love most around one table, sharing jokes and talking about their day. Sometimes these meals end in tears and sometimes they get interrupted with time-outs, but being together is still worth the effort.
6. Poopy underwear is more disgusting than poopy nappies/diapers. This is from a Momma who happily cloth diapered her baby. I don't know why it is different, but underwear just adds an awkward factor to poop accidents that seriously upped the gag factor for me.
5. I don't know how to get poop out of carpet. Thank goodness for wood floors, disposable mop heads and bleach!
4. Hungry kids are scarier than hungry men. ALWAYS pack snacks.
3. I really don't like Fireman Sam. It is obnoxious, ridiculous and my kid is obsessed. I confess that the very limited TV time in our house is not just because I am a conscientious mama...
2. My attitude influences my toddler. I know we like to complain about our kids' tantrums. And toddlers are emotional and DO throw tantrums. However, I am starting to realise that those 'bad' days we sometimes have start with ME and my bad attitude. Little ones look to us to set the example. We can't expect them to be polite when we are snapping at them and nagging them. We can't expect them to share when we are being stingy with our time. We can't expect them to happily follow our instructions when we make no effort or time to listen to their stories or concerns. It is the most humbling of lessons to see my bad attitude and behaviors reflected back to me in my little one. Being a mom is challenging me to become a better human being.
1. I have never laughed or cried more. The highs and lows of parenting littles are both precious. I am so thankful to be my little boy's mom, to watch him grow and explore the world. Our home is filled with laughter, love and lots of prayers as a result of this one kid and every day is sweeter for his presence in our lives.
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